When I was little, I walked around the house tying tying tying. Tying shoelaces and tying hair and tying my toys and attempting to tie the cat’s tail.
Because I didn’t like things untied.
It meant something was hanging off, hanging out, it wasn’t connected, it wasn’t finished.
And it bothered me.
Years later, the problem has reversed.
“Hey Natalie! How are you? I haven’t heard your voice in forever!”
“Yeah…” For good reason
“Where have you been?”
“Busy. A lot of school work.” A lot of good school work, but still. Exhibition coming up on Rwanda, need to prepare…doesn’t help I'm talking to you
“Oh, I went to the mall yesterday”
“That’s great Tigger” Oh will you please shut up for the love of God! You NEVER talk about ANYTHING but yourself!
“You need to come over next week.”
“Tigger, I’m really busy-”
“You heard me.”
“Tigger please, I’m really stressed” Not that tone, man she is going to get pissed, but it’s true, Rwandan exhibition is coming up and Simba will be there, I want it to look good…
“I don’t believe you.”
“Don’t believe what?” Crap, she knows she knows she knows how does she always know?!
“You haven’t been talking to me because you’ve been making ‘friends’, isn’t that right?”
“Of course not” Crap
“Natalie, when are you going to learn? No one wants to be your friend. They’re lying to you. Why would anyone want to be friends with you of all people? You’re fat, ugly, have no talents…”
“I’m not trying to make friends, really-”
“Or maybe this goes even deeper. Natalie’s not considering good friends, or LOVE, is she? Even though she knows no one would ever like her back? Well, why would they...you're not being serious, are you?”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“You are. But why I wonder? You know that no one likes you, you know your worthless…”
“Yeah…I know”
“I take pity on you though. I'll always be here. Come over next week for a sleep-over”
“Yes Tigger.”
“Goodbye, I love you”
“Bye”
***
“Hello Natalie.”
“What?”
“Oh, your not sore over our get-together last night, are you?”
“…”
“It wasn’t that bad, you know you liked it.”
“I have to go”
“You’re not trying to make other friends are you?”
“Tigger, I have to go.”
“I don't care. Tell me. Are you?”
“No.” I hate you I hate you, why can’t I make you just go away…
“You are”
“No, I’m not! I’m not! I’m not trying to make friends and I swear I don’t have a crush or anything remotely close! I swear! I KNOW that I’m not good enough for anyone, I KNOW! You've told me a million times! Why would I even consider it if it will just make me more miserable in the end?!”
“Good.”
“Bye”
***
“Natalie, you there?”
“Hello?”
“Natalie?”
***
“Natalie?”
“Hi”
“What the fuck Natalie? It’s been a month! Where have you been!?”
“Oh…hanging out with friends…”
“….what?”
“You heard me. Hanging out with friends. Real ones. Ones that don’t molest me during sleep-overs.”
“I wasn’t mol-”
“Yes, you were. But it doesn’t matter anymore. Because now I have real friends, ones that care about me and love me even though you say no one can. I do. So there. I. Win. And guess what? I do have a crush. And he found out that I liked him and he still thinks I'm cool mostly. And I have a brother.”
“Do you know what your saying Natalie?”
“Yes. I do. I’m done. I’m sick of your tyranny, and I’m DONE. I hate you, I’ve always hated you! Get out of my life!”
“No.”
“What do you mean ‘no’?”
“I’m going to find your friends.”
“….what-”
“You heard me. Either disentangle yourself from them, or I will hurt them.”
“…”
“You know I will.”
“I hate you so much.”
“Don’t use that tone with me.”
“…”
“Think about. Good night, I love you”
*slam*
***
“Hello Natalie. How are you?”
“…”
“You thought about it?”
“…”
“I’ll let you think a bit longer.”
***
“Hello?”
“I thought about it”
“Good. Why don’t you come over?”
“No.”
“…?”
“No. I realized something. I am prepared to die for my friends, it doesn’t matter what you do. I’m with them. I'll protect them myself”
“You’ll endanger your friends just to be with them?”
“…”
“You think that’s the answer?”
“Tigger, if I told my mother the things that you’ve done, you would be halfway to Juvie right now.”
“It wasn’t that bad. And you won’t tell your mother. You won’t tell anyone.”
“I told my friends.”
“What.”
“I told them”
“You’re abandoning me for some friends and a crush you haven’t even known for that long-”
“They mean more to me than anything else in the world. Especially you. I have nothing more to say to you, I’m done. Just stay away from my friends.”
“You’re going to regret this-”
“Like hell I will -slam-”
***
hey nat
Hey Simba.
talked to blueman lately? ; )
XP Don’t be mean.
i wasnt, i was curios just curios ^^. hows jazmine and snow?
They’re good <3 How are you?
school suuuuuuuuucks, i cant wait till i can come to hth i want to so badly…
You’re in the waiting pool, that’s all we can do for now
i know, but still. your school is so awesome, and all of your friends are awesome
Yeah…I’d fight for them any day…
wha?
Nothing ^_^ <3
okay. is there something wrong? you sound….stressed..
Far from it, I’m really happy. I just tied the last knot in my life.
holy crap you got married/?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!??!?!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?! O-o
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Entirely true.
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Comments
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... どのよう面倒な ¬_¬
影真似の術... 成功
◕ ◡◡ ◕
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... どのよう面倒な ¬_¬
影真似の術... 成功
◕ ◡◡ ◕
no body should have to take that kinda of nonsense from anybody~!
... "last deviation" ???!?! NOO~! are you... areyou... QUITTING dA??!!? >.< NOO~!!
--
Change makes the world go around.
Change can somehow save a life.
But Change always makes me sad.
I wish everything could just stay the way it is.
Just last one for now, Im taking a break.
--
Come to the dark side, we have C strings!
~Avatar by Novanator
--
Come to the dark side, we have C strings!
~Avatar by Novanator
--
Stupidity is like a skill
some are born with it while others hone it over time.
YOU CAN"T HANDEL THE TRUTH [link]
*phew* okay, have a wonderful break! <3
--
Change makes the world go around.
Change can somehow save a life.
But Change always makes me sad.
I wish everything could just stay the way it is.
That's great for you! You know the only thing that would make it better?
Singing the "Joy to the World; Wormy is Dead" song :3
I just randomly got that stuck in my head...
(You is so strong Nattie. Meh woulda criedddd. T^T)
--
Be like a brick. Be the building block of something big.
Be like a cherry blossom tree. Be beautiful but strong at the same time.
Be like a band aid. Help someone who is hurt.
Be like a fan. Be cool.
--
... どのよう面倒な ¬_¬
影真似の術... 成功
◕ ◡◡ ◕
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